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Adoption

Adoption Update October 2018

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Melody and Pete: Our Adoption Story from Corinne Toussaint on Vimeo.

Our Adoption Update October 2018 

One of the first questions I normally receive when asked about my adoption is, “How can you afford your adoption?” This is normally followed by a brief explanation of how my husband and I have paid off over $72k of our debt and have freed up a lot of our expenses. Many people are very curious about our adoption process, so I thought I’d share how our adoption is going as well.

As of October 2018, we have paid nearly $3,000 in the homestudy adoption expenses for our international adoption for a little boy or girl from the Philippines. Before I begin to explain what those expenses go towards, I’d like to further explain how the process works.

The adoption process can seem overwhelming with the amount of paperwork and rigorous interviews, but the end result of course is to welcome a child into your home. This of course is something we have been working towards for nearly 8 months so far.

Adoption Process Overview

The adoption process (so far as I can see ) includes 6 main steps.

  1. Homestudy
  2. Dossier
  3. Matching
  4. Acceptance of Referral
  5. Travelling to Meet Your Child
  6. Finalization of Legally Adopting Your Child

The Homestudy

The homestudy is a rigorous application for adoption. Basically, if you’ve ever felt like you want your entire life subjected to review by many different people, this is what it would feel like. I’m not complaining- okay well sort of. This process can be grueling as it will include extensive interviews in person with you and your partner (if applicable) and questions pertaining parenting style, reason for adopting, personality questions, and even questions about the ages of your siblings and relationship with your parents and close relatives. Other aspects of the homestudy include multiple reflective essays, reading multiple research documents about adoption, obtaining financial, employment, and medical records to provide to your social worker.

Whew! I’m tired just writing about all this stuff!

So far the homestudy is just about complete! I’m waiting for my social worker to send the lengthy document in the mail.

Related Article: How We Paid of $72k of student loans

The Dossier << – We Are Here…

This part of the adoption process is mainly only due to the fact that we are adopting internationally. Because of this the Philippines InterCountry Adoption Agency Board wants to request specific information about your adoption in addition to your homestudy.

This part includes additional reference letters to verify character, psychological assessments, completion of official forms, fingerprinting and additional background checks. We also had to fill out a form to indicate the degree of medical condition we would be willing to accept along with age preferences.

Right now we are still in the process of the Dossier since our homestudy had some delays because of a recent job transition.

Related Article: The Planning Period

The Matching Process

The adoption process is long and tedious. A quick approval from the ICAB could take as little as 1.5 years, but as long as 5 years! Here’s a link to the LA times’s article about why it takes so long. Basically, the idea is that you are matched with a child, not vice versa so that a good personality fit will be taken before finalizing an official match.

One of my favorite blog’s about the adoption from the Philippines is from a website called House of Rose.

Related Post: Two Countries One Heart

Referral and Travelling Time

Once you get a referral to a potential match, you will have time to review medical information, pictures, and other personality information. The Philippines does not send you a picture before your match and you are not allowed to request a specific gender. If you decide for any reason that you cannot accept your match, you will be denied a prospective child from the Philippines adoption program and you’ll have to start again with a different country or try your hand at domestic adoption.

The travel time is required to pick up your child after you accept him/her and a minimum of 7 days are needed to become adjusted to you as much as possible.

Finalization of Legalizing Your Adoption

Once you have travelled back to the states, you’ll need to go through the process of legalizing your adoption through your local and federal government. And of course, you guessed it – more paperwork!

Just because we don’t know exactly when our little one will be coming, doesn’t mean we don’t believe in the love we will one day share. I hope that wherever you are you take time to cherish the loved ones around you and continue to accept all the beautiful things around you no matter how small.

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4 Comments

  • Kim Duncan

    I have several friends who have done international adoptions so I knew a little what the process was like. God Bless you and your husband for taking this on! I look forward to reading your updates and eventually “meeting” your new family member. All the best!

    • Melody

      Thank you so much, Kim! I know that time is definitely a big factor in all of this. I hope that I can shed light to others who are interested in adoption because it really is an awesome thing once it all gets done.

    • Melody

      Thank you so much, Laura! It’s been a journey and we are continuing to believe that we will get through this one day at a time.